i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize
