she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
40s are totally the cure
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
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