i think my mom watched the whole time
im about as happy as oj after his trial
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
