You're so nebulous sometimes
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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