it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
That reminds me...we need to get swords
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
