I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize