: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize