the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
whose ass print is on the piano?
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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