I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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