worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Randomize
