you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
