Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize