Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Randomize
