One girl and one boy is just not enough.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I need water and some morals
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
