Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
my sisters under your porch take her home
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
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