i think my tv is drunk
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
