I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
