me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
