we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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