I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Randomize
