you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
