That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Randomize
