I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
it's not cheating when I paid for it
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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