Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
