I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
