Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
