Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Do vagina's smell?
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
