i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
My ATM looks so different sober.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Randomize
