coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
