I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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