p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
