come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
