One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
