Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
