weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
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