So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
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