Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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