we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Acid is not a monday night drug
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Randomize
