I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
