Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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