omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
