What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
