Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
