why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
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