Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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