I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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