i just wanna soil my oats bro
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize