Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize