why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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