Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
