batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
i drank out of a bidet.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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